If you gaze long into a navel, the navel also gazes into you.
Month: October 2017
Our analysis suggests that the difference in promotion rates between men and women in this company was due not to their behavior but to how they were treated. This indicates that arguments about changing women’s behavior — to “lean-in,” for example — might miss the bigger picture: Gender inequality is due to bias, not differences in behavior.
I think it’s possible to disagree, and even to passionately argue, without doing what I would call “fighting”. To me, “fighting” is when you deliberately try to hurt the other person – like you would if you were fighting physically.
Yeah, no… that is definitely not the thing I mean.
The thing I mean is, like, “we agreed on who was going to do which house chores but she still doesn’t put away her dirty cups and it drives me bananas, so I told her that really pissed me off. She got angry back because it’s an executive function issue for her, so we hashed it out in less than polite voices but eventually decided I would handle the cups even if they’re hers, but she would do this other thing it’s less hard for her to do.”
That (your example) is absolutely not something I’d call a fight, and
perfectly fine in my opinion – the outcome was a workable compromise that would make things better in the future, and both parties were apparently equally pissed with neither being made to feel wrong or inferior in any way.
FWIW, I think most of the disagreement in this whole discourse is about
differing definitions of fighting. To me, a fight is an encounter that ends in victory or defeat, and the loser slinks away to lick their emotional wounds in private and over many fights grows weary and fearful of fighting again and tries to bury every disagreement because the only alternative is getting hurt in another lost fight and grows quietly resentful in the process.
Which is pretty fucking unhealthy, and (somewhat paradoxically) also seems to be quite close to your horror scenario of a relationship without fighting.
ALL OF YOU CONSERVATIVES ARE LYING WHEN YOU SAY THERES STEPS TO AQUIRE A GUN THE US! ALL HE NEEDED TO DO WAS BUY IT.
Are private sellers required to do all that? Checking his ID would’ve been basic and definitely should have been done, but are they legally held to any standard?
Wtf…
No they aren’t
From what I gather, anti gun people consider this a loophole that they’re trying to close. Pro-gun people are okay with this because they worry that any rule imposed would make it illegal for them to sell to one another.
This is just a reminder that when Sir Terry Pratchett was knighted, he dug up his own iron ore, learned to smelt, smelted it, added meteorite iron, learned to forge, and forged himself a starmetal sword. As you do.
And then he put it away somewhere safe so he wouldn’t violate any UK knife laws.
I’m way cooler than all the other hawks in the forest, and it’s not just because of the whole sentience thing. What was way more important was my phone.
It wasn’t a phone as much as it was a very small, very light, very tight thought-speak capable device that people could call when needed. Cassie sort of forced it on me. I didn’t really want it at first, but she’s kept her promise to never give anyone but Loren the number. I always keep it on my ankle, and it zips into z-space like a morphing suit.
It’d gone off twice today, which was really weird. I mean, if only two people ever contact you, then it’s pretty wild when they do so at the same time. I called Cassie back, but got her answering machine. She was probably busy. I called Loren, and she answered right away.
Hmm, I feel conflicted about this, largely because of TERF-y arguments about trans women running along similar lines.
I’m not quite sure what the analogy is here, but if it’s “tell me you have a dick whenever you re in public around cis women because otherwise you’re making me unsafe,” a penis is not something most people aren’t carrying that you could use to maim or kill someone at any moment and that they likely wouldn’t have enough time to react to to stop you.
(It’s also not something you can unload *….snerk* or just leave at home)
It’s “if you are Biologically Male™ you need to present as male rather than pretending you are female because Biological Males™ are much stronger than females, so they could harm us, and they tend to be more violent so we need to be extra careful around them and especially not think they’re lesbians and go on dates with them where we might even be alone and get raped”.
Which has a bit more basis in reality (physical strength is something that could be used to harm or kill, especially if one’s victim is much weaker, and statistically AMAB people are more violent etc.), and while I don’t think either of those things are inherently threatening, a responsibly-carried gun at the hips of someone who doesn’t use it is arguably no more so.
…not that I want to argue for carrying guns here. The few times in my life I was in the presence of actual, visible guns I was pretty uncomfortable. I’m just also pretty skeptical of arguments based on other people’s discomfort, because people are uncomfortable with a lot of things I really want to keep (or become) legal in public spaces.
(Well, not in a way that empties it 😛 but if you’re responsible for letting other people make decisions about how careful they are around you, that doesn’t seem to matter.)
Omphaloskeptomai 